this shit rocks no. 100: THE TOP 100 PRODUCTS THAT I CURRENTLY OWN
I'm ranking 'em!!! 🎉🎉🎉
Holy SHIT!!!!!! It’s the 100th sending!!!! I wanted to put together a little something special for this momentous milestone, so I decided to round up the TOP 100 PRODUCTS THAT I CURRENTLY OWN.
You’ll recognize some of these products as ones that have been previously featured, while some of these products are brand new to TSR. I hope you love them all as much as I do.
Before we get into it, I want to THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE AND THANK YOU FOR READING! Writing this newsletter is always my favorite activity of the week. There is no greater compliment than someone telling me they enjoy reading it.
As a special thank you to everyone who reads my newsletter, I’m offering a very special, very rare 30% off discount for annual subscriptions. That means a yearly subscription is now $35 instead of the regular $50.
Upgrade to a paid subscription and support my work HERE!
But, Sara, all of your recipes are free? Ah yes, that is currently true, but after this sending, I’m going to start sending out some recipes specifically for paid subscribers ONLY. We’re in the triple digits now which means it’s time to get serious. Get in on the fun while it’s discounted! The sale will last through May 31st.
There is, however, no recipe this week because the mounting pressure of creating the perfect recipe for the 100th sending was simply too much. There will be one next week.
And, now, I present to you the official ranking of the Top 100 Products That I Currently Own. I want to emphasize that the only items that qualify for this list are things in my CURRENT possession. So, for example, I can’t include this weird lime green hand chair that I begged my parents to buy for me in elementary school because I’m pretty sure they burned it the second I left for college (hence, it is no longer in my possesion). Are the parameters of this list clear?
Congratulations to all the brands featured in today’s sending. I’d also like to offer a gentle reminder to the brands that did not make the list this time around, who’s to SAY what I will do for the 200th sending?
100. Fluff Yeah Ugg Slippers. I bought a pair of these for my BFF Marley’s birthday a few years ago, and when I went to check out, I realized I needed a matching pair. I had no idea that they’d turn into the footwear that I’d turn to pretty much everyday. All the video content that is posted to my IG was probably shot while wearing these.
99. Lilac Checkered Bath Towels. Do I look like someone who has neutral colored towels???? No.
98. Select-a-Size Bounty Paper Towels. Never buy the full size!!! The worst!!!
97. Vuori Performance Joggers. I wear these all the time. So comfy. I’ve had them for a while now, and they’ve really stood the test of time.
96. Katie Kimmel Pink Watermelon Dog Vase. It is hard for me to convey the joy it brings me when I put flowers in this vase. It truly lights up a room in seconds.
95. Fishwife Tuna Salad Sandwich Hat. It’s a good hat!!!!! People read it and smile!!! I’m devastated to report that it may be sold out? Luckily the mermaid hat is just as fun.
94. Beats Wireless Headphones. I have had this same pair of headphones since college (and trust me, it shows) but these headphones have been through so much with me (including the 26.2 miles that I ran around NYC last November, do you remember that?). I kind of hate the pink color now, but I keep them around to remind myself of the person who I used to be.
93. Pink Microplane. Having a microplane lets people know that I am a chef who is serious about cooking, but having a microplane with a neon pink handle let’s people know that I am a chef who likes to have a little, cheeky, flirty, feminine fun from time to time.
92. Oreo Mint Thins and Cool Whip (counting this as one product because they must be enjoyed together). My current house dessert is a mint Oreo thins sandwich with a thick layer of Cool Whip. Hits every time.
91. Olaplex no. 5 Conditioner. I pretty much always let my hair air dry (because I’m too lazy to blow dry or style it), and my hair dries noticeably better when I use this product. It’s expensive and the bottles are tiny but it is worth it, IMO!
90. Trader Joe’s Bourbon Vanilla Bean Paste. I think one of the greatest misconceptions of modern day society is that “vanilla” implies blandness or simplicity. I think it is one of the most complex and rich flavors. I LOVE when I can see the vanilla bean flecks, which is why I love baking with this paste. It’s so affordable and the flavor is divine.
89. Barnacle Foods Bullwhip Kelp Hot Sauce. It’s just…the best. And whenever I eat it, it takes me back to one of my favorite trips. And it makes for a really taste homemade Cheez It.
88. Vitamix 5200 Blender. I got this on sale a couple Black Fridays ago and it is the gift that keeps on giving. My protein shake game has never been stronger.
87. Adidas Black Sambas. Maybe this is basic but I really do love ‘em?? And the black color is nice because they don’t get dirty and gross quite as quickly.
86. Adidas Barricade 13 Tennis Shoes. And you know what, while we’re talking about hot Adidas footwear, now seems like a good time to remind you that I have the hottest sneakers on the tennis court.
85. Junk Food Budweiser Vintage Tee. I am fairly certain that I bought this in 2018, and it has really held up. Bottom line here is that it’s a nice fitting vintage tee. I did send it through the Suay Dye bath so it’s now a lovely shade of lavender.
84. Vaseline Rosy Lips. I buy the mini packs of 8 so that I can have one in my bathroom, one in my fanny pack, one in my car, etc. It’s not too pink but it’s just pink enough.
83. This rainbow tie-dye sweatshirt that I got at a thrift store. So oversized. So colorful. God bless whoever sold this to the Mar Vista Crossroads.
82. Extra Toasty Cheez Its. We knew this was coming.
81. Easy Walk No Pull Harness. It’s nothing stylish but Pepper is a better walker when she’s on it.
80. Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat. It’ll make you a better cook.
79. OPI Rich Girls & Po’ Boys. Okay I don’t technically own this color at home, but I have paid for it enough times at the salon (gel and dip) that I am claiming partial ownership. It’s a damn good blue.
78. Spindrift Grapefruit. Nothing turns my house into a home like an 8-pack. I am a grapefruit girl, through and through. To me, this tastes like procrastination, feeling hungry but not knowing what sounds good, and the hour of 3 pm.
77. Laura Mercier Translucent Setting Powder. It keeps my t-zone from looking crazy and it just feels nice to apply. A little goes a long way.
76. Orbit Bubble Gum. Did you know that your life is better when you keep a container of gum in your car? And life is flirtier and happier when it’s PINK bubble gum?
75. My Fake ID. I don’t remember how much I paid for this and it obviously no longer has any use, but a price cannot be stamped on what this stupid little thing gave me access to. I still have it and every now and again I like to look at it because it is the hottest I have ever looked in a photograph. I am the most gorgeous girl on my fake ID. One day, I’ll share the photo. But not today.
74. Brinker and Eliza Psychedelic Mushroom Earrings. I love these mismatched earrings. Boys always look at these and go, “are those mushrooms?” Yes, you giant idiot.
73. SimpleHuman Rectangular Step Trash Can. It only recently dawned upon me that nice trash cans are actually quite pricey. I figured the trash can in my new apartment was a business investment, so I got a good one and I am very happy with this bin.
72. Masking Tape Dispenser. I bought one of these (and a stack of colorful masking tape) so that I didn’t have to hand cut the tape when I’d use it, but would still have straight lines at the ends of my labels (like they do on The Bear). I’m a CHEF.
71. Monday Swimwear Kauai Top. I have admittedly not tried on enough swimsuits to definitively say that this is the best brand, but this top is super cute and comfy. The only suits that I wore last summer (and probably now this summer) were from this brand.
70. Baggu Reversible Hand Towels. They have smiley faces on them!!!
69. Nuvaring. I wanted to put something SEXY for this number, and what is sexier than contraceptives? I feel like everyone has a bad perception of Nuvaring because it has been known to give some users some pretty gnarly side effects, and this makes me feel like I’m using the bad boy of birth control. We’re coming up on 10 years together which makes this one of the greatest, strongest, and most effective partnerships of my adult life.
68. Ground Cumin (not brand specific). It is my favorite spice.
67. Lumify. This is one of those products that I bought for truly no reason and honestly, I forget to use it a majority of the time. But whenever I do use it, I think, “wow, what a subtle yet powerful enhancement this has done to my face. I should use this more often.”
66. Downy April Fresh Odor Defense Scent Booster Beads. This came into my life at the gym where I used to work out because every time I’d bury my face in a sweat towel, I was entranced by its aroma. I am a sweaty, sweaty girl, and this stuff keeps my workout clothes, which I consistently drag to hell and back, FRESH.
65. Crow Canyon Catalina Small Rectangular Tray. I love these because they can both be used as a functional quarter sheet or a more aesthetic serving plate.
64. Sugar Kiss Melon. These orange-hued melons do not come into season until later in the summer, but they are literal candy. They look like cantaloupe but taste SO MUCH BETTER.
63. Mannkitchen Black Pepper Grinder. This one got a whole newsletter all to itself, so of course it’s in the top 100. One of life’s most basic joys is a good, wholesome grind.
62. Blundstone Chelsea Boots. This is another purchase that has really stood the test of time. I use them in the kitchen, on rainy days, or whenever I feel like stomping around. I even got serious about them and bought a boot cleaning kit because contrary to what my Dad thinks about me, I actually can care for my things.
61. Old Navy Sky High Wide Leg Jeans. You may notice an absence of clothing items on this list and that is because I’ve recently decided that I hate my entire wardrobe. These jeans, however, I own in many washes and continue to enjoy. People are shocked when I tell them they’re from Old Navy, which always provides me with a hefty dose of endorphins.
60. This Tile Console that I Bought on Facebook Marketplace.
59. Bar Keeper’s Friend. I am just a girl doing my best to keep her things in good shape. There is nothing that BKF and a little elbow grease can’t remove.
58. Brita Large Water Dispenser. LA tap water is literally a crime against humanity. But not anymore, thanks to my BRITA!
57. Secret Completely Clean Gel Deodorant. This is actually a partnership that may pre-date my Nuvaring. I literally don’t understand how people CHOOSE stick deodorant. People have recommended some natural deodorants to me in the past, but I can’t seem to stray from the one I’ve used for decades.
56. Kacey Musgraves Slow Burn and/or Deeper Well Candle. Iconic Songs. Iconic artist. Iconic candles.
55. Harry Styles Watermelon Sugar T-Shirt. When I bought this shirt at the beginning of Covid, it was a deep black color, and now today it is a worn and faded gray. I secretly think my mom hates this shirt of mine, not because this song is about munching a box, but because I lived in her house for a year and wore it everyday. Anyway, Harry is single again and it is time to rejoice.
54. Halfdays Lawrence Jacket and Alessandra Pants (both in Granita). Even though my day to day wardrobe is shitty, Santa stepped up to the plate this year and blessed me with a sick new outfit for the slopes. Shredddddd!
53. Cuisinart 14-Cup Food Processor. This was another item that was bestowed to me by the powers of Mr. Claus and I am endlessly grateful. She’s a big mama jama and that’s just the way I like it.
52. Watermelon Bath Mat. S’cuteeeee!
51. Melanzana Micro Hoodie. I’m not even going to bother getting into the lore of this brand (you’ll notice everything on their website is “by appointment only,” like, okay?!!?), but there is nothing that signals a connection to the state of Colorado quite like wearing one of these hoodies. Nevertheless, it’s a quality piece of clothing and it really does keep me warm.
50. Cotopaxi Allpa 35L Travel Pack. I bought this for my 3-week Japan excursion last year and it was the perfect piece of luggage that allowed me to travel without a checked bag or rolling suitcase. Very epic and the colors are exciting.
49. Educated Mess Hair of the Dog Recovery Mask. This fizz mask is one that you can HEAR and feel. I can’t really explain the sensation, but after you use it, your skin really does feel notably different.
48. My passport. This has been really helpful when it comes to seeing other countries and exploring new cultures. I don’t remember what I paid, but worth it!
47. KitchenAid Stand Mixer. This is the highest ranking appliance of my big 3 (food processor, blender, and stand mixer) because it is lavender. My mom got this for me when I graduated culinary school and the mixer, of course, lives on my counter for all my guests to admire.
46. Stanley Adventure Cooler. Keeps my shit cold when I’m camping and when I’m private cheffing.
45. Tony’s Chocoloney Dark Milk Chocolate Pretzel Toffee. This is the brand of chocolate that made me realize that I actually do like milk chocolate. The saltier, the better.
44. Modelo. I have 2 (24-packs) of this in my pantry leftover from my birthday party which is why this qualifies as a product that I currently own. It’s the superior lager for Bloody’s and Micheladas.
43. Tajin. If the rim isn’t salted with chili lime goodness, I don’t want it.
42. Fish Spatula. It’s good for so much more than FISH.
41. Amazon Fire TV. This is nothing more than the vessel that Summer House is delivered to eyes, ears, and soul, making it one of the most crucial items in my possession.
40. Fairlife Milk. Big dairy is not a sponsor of TSR (though, I am open to discussing). My understanding is that this milk is like regular cow’s milk, but through some process that is unclear to me, this milk has more protein than usual. At the end of the day, it all comes down to the GAINS for me, so this goes in my shopping cart every week.
39. East Fork Pottery Everyday Bowls. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. They are the perfect size vessel for salads and bowls and pastas and things. I want one in every color (please?).
38. Studio Arhoj Dot. I have 2 dots that sit on my nightstand. They serve absolutely no purpose but I think they’re cute and they’re fun to collect. I have given these as birthday gifts to my friends because every time they look at their dot, I want them to think of their dear friend, Sara.
37. L.L. Bean Adult’s Classic Fleece Pullover. My dad bought me one of these because I would always steal his whenever I was home, so now we have the same pullover in different colors. Our father daughter bond grows stronger!
36. 4-Piece Multi Function Kitchen Timers. I hate having dirty kitchen hands and then having to set a timer on my phone, which is why having cute kitchen timers that are not as delicate as my phone screen are a good idea. Plus they are fun magnets to have on the fridge.
35. The Last 2 Remaining He’s Not Here Cups that I Still Have From College. One holds pens at my desk and the other holds rolls of dog poop bags. Thanks, UNC!
34. My Custom Watercolor Artwork by Emily Sundberg (2018). Some of you guys might know her as a fancy business newsletter author, but I’ve known her since middle school home room (put that in your pipe and smoke it!!!!!!!!!). She made me this for me and it is proudly displayed in my kitchen.
33. Eva NYC Therapy Session Hair Mask. When I want my hair to air-dry nicely but I’m not quite prepared to dole out my expensive Olaplex conditioner (this one’s only $15!), I’ll put some of this on my hair in the shower. Makes my hair so soft and nice.
32. Wilson 28.5 Outdoor Basketball. Every now and then, a strong urge comes over me to go SHOOT SOME HOOPS. Luckily I have this guy. And it’s a regulation women’s sized ball because I am a woman.
31. Catbird Big Hoop Dream Earrings. I wear them everyday because I just think they make my face look better.
30. Diamond Crystal Kosher Salt. In DC we trust!!!
29. Diet Coke. In DC we trust!!!
28. Beyond Yoga Cropped Tank. I wouldn’t necessarily wear this for working out but it’s perfect for lounging or light walks. When it get oppressively hot, it’s the perfect tank. I usually pick whatever colors are on sale.
27. Beyond Yoga Midi High Waist Leggings. I will never stop shouting about my love for Beyond Yoga. I ran the NYC Marathon in those bad boys, FFS!
26. Beyond Yoga Skort. Now, this is huge. Beyond Yoga has made a historic debut on my top 100 list, occupying spots 26-28. The ONLY brand in history to occupy 3 (nonetheless consecutive) spots. Congratulations to everyone involved and congrats on your good work. They are not paying me for this prime marketing opportunity. Their fabric just AGREES with me, what can I say? And this skort is a treat.
25. Hue Socks. They are the comfiest and the perfect height on your ankles. I just noticed they have these fun striped ones that I may need to purchase.
24. Mezzetta Castelvetrano Pitted Olives. The gateway olive. Get into it! Briny and bright and salty and delish.
23. Shark Pet Cordless Stick Vacuum. I didn’t want to spend money on a Dyson but this thing really gets the job done.
22. Iron Flask Water Bottle (22 oz). I am so emotionally attached to this water bottle that when the lid broke on my last one, I ordered the exact same one to replace it. I don’t go anywhere without it.
21. White Bark Workwear Crossback Apron. The bougainvillea color is SO CUTE, and it’s been my go-to apron for the past couple months. I got mine when they were doing a free embroidery event so mine even says “Tane” on it, which is a great way to remind people that I do not fuck around in the kitchen.
For the sake of transparent journalism, I feel I should also disclose that they embroidered me a very special hat that says “I love Pepper,” which is a good reminder to any brands reading this that if you shower me in nice, thoughtful things, you stand a greater chance in being featured in my award-winning newsletter. Anyway, use code “TANE” for 10% off!
20. Weleda Skin Food. The texture of this product is unlike any other moisturizer, but it’s so good for pimples that you have detected in the early stages of forming. It also smells nice.
19. My retainers. I hate to sleep without them.
18. Good Culture Cottage Cheese. NEVER NOT IN MY FRIDGE. DO YOU HEAR ME? There are cheaper options, but I buy this one because I love myself, and I deserve top shelf curds.
17. Kiwi Gurgle Pot. These water pitchers make the most insane sounds. I love them to tears.
16. Clare V. Petite Zip Wallet. This is the first thing I bought when my first unemployment check from the state of New York hit my account in 2020. Getting laid off from my job was one of the best things to ever happen to me and this wallet is physical proof.
15. Passion Fruit Yogurt from Ari’s Natural Foods (purchased at the Hollywood Farmers’ Market on Sundays). You have to go early before he sells out.
14. Weber Spirit E-310 3 Burner Liquid Propane Grill Black. Assembling this was one of my proudest moments. This is also by far the greatest product I have ever been gifted by a brand. An opportunity of a lifetime.
13. Gozney Roccbox Pizza Oven. Well, while we’re on the topic of epic outdoor cooking appliances, might as well mention that I have one of these (it’s lime green, because I have taste), and I don’t use it nearly as much as I should, but my god, when I do, it is AMAZING.
12. Ninja Creami. And you know, while we’re on the topic of items that I am criminally under-utilizing, let’s talk Creami. I’m putting it this high up on my ranking as a promise to myself that I will use it more. I store it in a rather precarious position in my pantry which deters me from taking it in and out of its home, but when I do, it’s MAGIC.
11. Our Place Cast Iron Grill Press. Something that you all may not know about me is that I make myself a quesadilla for dinner 3-5 nights out of the week and this press is ESSENTIAL for the perfect ‘dilla. I also use it for making toast and chicken/steak on the grill or cast iron. I have the lavender, it’s CUTE.
10. Whipped Cream (not brand specific). Did you know that you can buy whipped cream and put it in your coffee or on your protein shakes whenever you want? Like, no one can stop you from doing that.
9. Fishwife Spicy Albacore Tuna. My favorite fishwife product tends to ebb and flow with the seasons, and right now it’s the spicy tuna. Lately I’ve just been crushing it straight out of the tin. And lucky for you, they’re doing a MDW sale, so use code “MEMORIALDAY20” for 20% off!
8. Maldon Flaky Salt. It’s these small, tiny treasures in the world that make life worth living. Life is short, get the bucket.
7. My Macbook Pro 13”. Would you believe I’m using it right now?
6. Shun Blonde Chef’s Knife. I am nothing without this pristine tool. She is with me through thick and thin. I don’t know how some of y’all do it with those dull blades in your kitchen. Couldn’t be me!
5. My 2021 XLE Toyota Rav 4. You know, I live in a town where the make and model of the car you drive does not go unnoticed. Luckily, hybrids are sexy, and I meet a lot of other people who also drive Rav 4s, which is so fun, because then we are immediately bonded through shared experiences.
4. Diptyque Eau Rose Body Lotion. When I’m not buying $80 hand soap, I’m buying $68 body lotion. To my credit, I have made this bottle last a long time because I only save it for very special occasions when I am really trying to tantalize an unsuspecting victim with my impossibly erotic scent.
I wore this lotion a lot around a specific crush a couple years ago, and now whenever I wear it, I think of him (the crush has dissipated, and full transparency, he never liked me back). But that doesn’t mean that I didn’t smell amazing.
3. Frederick’s & Mae Confetti Cutting Board. You know her, you love her, you see her all the time. Talk about DAILY JOY. I love working on this board.
2. Susan Alexandra Watermelon Dog Collar. My sweet little Pepper gets so many compliments wearing this, and I love to chime in and mention that I have a matching pair of earrings.
1. Catbird Diamond Kitten Mitten. I mulled over the number 1 spot on this countdown, and after much deliberation, it had to go to THE kitten mitten, a product that was famously featured on the THIRD sending of this newsletter, where I wrote a short essay on the story of procuring this treasured item.
I used to wear it everyday, but I will admit that as LIFTING WEIGHTS has become a large part of my schedule and personality, I wear it less because I would never forgive myself if a GD barbell damaged such an important piece. That said, I like to break it out for occasions when I exit the house wearing mascara It is my absolute favorite. I am my best self when the kitten mitten is locked and loaded. Once I get my diamond-covered paws on their tennis bracelet, you won’t hear the end of it.
YOU MADE IT! This concludes to the Top 100 Products that I Currently Own. I hope you enjoyed it, and please tell me the products that I’m missing out on!
A fresh new recipe will be in your inbox next Friday. Don’t forget to take advantage of this VERY limited time sale on annual subscriptions. THANKS FOR READING! You ROCK!
congrats on 100 issues! it's no easy feat.